We’re not out of the woods yet!

When they said remission, I did breath a sigh of relief, and thought we were out of the woods. Two weeks later Jared went back to the hospital with a blood clot on his brain. I did breath a sigh of relief again, and thought we were out of the woods, when the headaches went away.  Sometimes it’s hard to believe how sick Jared is because he looks so healthy. This week when Jared was in the hospital we had a nurse that has worked with cancer patients for 30 years. She was a wealth of information. She said Jared looks so good for what he has been though. Talking with her made me realize again we are not out of the woods; in fact we are deep in the woods. What is really happening is we are just take a different path. The nurse explained why we needed to have hospital stays for the chemo Jared is on right now. She explained this is such a strong chemo Jared is receiving if he didn’t get the antidote, and then they didn’t make sure the antidote was working, Jared would be dead in two weeks. Jared hardly ever complains I only know he’s sick more because I hear him when he gets sick.

The thing that has helped us as we travel through the deep dark woods is faith. Faith lights our path even when it storms. Faith that God loves us, and sees the whole picture. Faith that he loves us, and wants what’s best for us in an eternal picture. I hear people say that if there were a loving god he wouldn't stand by and allow such suffering. Our time here on earth is for learning. When I was going through my first divorce, I couldn’t understand why a loving Father would let this happen to me. I prayed with my all my heart to understand why. I finally received an answer, to help me understand. The words were so clear I still remember them, “Ginger, how could ask me to take away someone else free agency, when you fought so valiantly in the War in Heaven”. This incredible message still brings tears to my eyes! I was valiant, in my Father’s eyes. I was strong, and could make it through this learning experience. Freedom has always been very important to me. My mother said the only thing I ever rebelled against was communism. When I was involved with adoptions, I spent time in Russia, Kazakhstan, Poland, and the Ukraine. It is very sad to see the negative effects on people that don’t have freedom. It is so important to our learning process. We need freedom and we need to let others have freedom too. Even through we will all be hurt by poor choices others make, and poor choices we make!

God is far more interested in what we do with our mistakes than he is the mistake.  It is also important for us to go through difficult situations. When we go through trials is when we learn life’s most important lessons. That’s when we learn patience, understand, compassion, and many other of the most important virtues. As Jared talked to this nurse she explained to Jared the positive things he will learn while he fights Leukemia. How it will help him make better choices, and he come stronger. Going through life’s challenges is like working out in a soul gym.

Jared has been amazing! Very seldom do I hear negative comments, or a complaint from him. He has made this experience easier for our family, because of this. When he first found out he had cancer, all he cared about was that it would be hard on his family! Jared could deal with the pain and his unknown future: his only fear was how it would effect us. Jared is amazing!

Our family could have watched a movie, or read a book about a family going through a child with Leukemia; but we wouldn’t have learned as much. So we make our way through these deep dark woods, using faith to light the way, and give us the strength to continue our journey. Faith that god loves us, and sees the whole picture. Faith to travel on the path he will guide us on, no matter what the destination might be.